Pictures and some news

OK, Pictures from the last week or so.

This one is titled: Look Momma, I can walk up and down the front steps with no hands!!! he was up and down the stairs for at least 10 minutes. You can also see the very brown, possibly dead grass from my front yard. We are in drought conditions here- temperatures up in 90-100 degree range and basically no rain for the last month (I think we have gotten maybe an inch of rain). I try to water the flowers, but they are feeling the pain of no rain too. The grass, I never water- grass is designed to go dormant in this type of weather and I refuse to waste a precious resource (water) on stuff I would prefer to get rid of anyway. This is Little Bug sweeping the floor- he likes this, every time I get it out, he wants to do the sweeping. Of course after he loses interest, I have to sweep the floors. This is another chore he will be taking on in the house in a few years.
This is dinner- please note the rice (uneaten), the chicken (barely eaten), the Ranch dressing originally for his carrots (totally eaten). Did he eat the carrots- no, they were pushed onto the floor. So you ask, what did he eat the ranch dressing with? Well, he ate it straight off his fingers and the few tomatoes that he decide were not too bad.
As he was eating the tomatoes and ranch dressing, he decided that his hair needed some conditioning with the ranch dressing, he also decided that his arms and shirt needed ranch dressing. Which of course lead to...
A bath!!! He finally figured out how to make the squirts work. He understood from day one that pressing on them, got him a squirt, but he had the hardest time figuring out how to fill the squirters back up. He got it suddenly!! He was so happy.
Nothing else going on with Little Bug. I have decided though (not the news from the title of this post) that I will not be joining choir this season. Little Bug has had a complete reversal of his bedtime habits since his babysitter has been over getting to know him the last few nights. She was going to be with him for about 2.5 hours one night a week. So I had her come over and hang out with us for that time that she would have been here had I gone to choir. Little Bug screamed when I put him in bed, he cried for a long time and I had to go back in over and over to calm him down, then he was waking up about 1-2 hours screaming for me. I think the situation reminded him of the last week in Guatemala. I will not traumatize him just so I can go to choir. So maybe after Christmas, I can rejoin choir. He will have been home for 6 months at that point, so hopefully and God willing, he will feel more secure. He needs me to be here for him and that it my job as his momma.

So the news: but first some background. Before I started on the path to international adoption, I read a book "Adopting on your own: a Single's guide to adoption" by Lee Varon (excellent book). She recommends that during the time you are considering adoption, you take the free classes in your state that would allow you to be a foster/adoptive parent through the foster care system in the US. Well, I took all the classes, did the home study and realized that I could not foster a child for up to 2 years in my home and then watch them leave my home to go to their parents. I was just not strong enough for that. But GOD has a way of showing us that we are stronger than we think and what we think is impossible is not.
So as I watched Little Bug's first family parent him and then learned that they parented him all his life (21.5 months), I realized that I could be strong enough, that GOD's grace is sufficient and he will give me strength to love a child and let them go if that is the plan. It may be painful, but anything worth having in life is worth the pain.
So this week I contacted my county foster care system and found out that my house study with them was written so I can only be an adoptive parent through the foster care system. If I want to foster, and I do, I have to take 20 hours of classes (the same ones I took in 2005), have another home study done (3 visits and then 6 months for them to write and approve it), have my hoe inspected by the fire Marshall (the 2nd time), get letters of reference (for the 3rd time), have my entire life laid open for others to judge me (for the 3rd time), all to be given a license to be a foster parent. This will likely take 9 months start to finish and then I wait for a foster child that meets the needs of my family (Little Bug and me). I can not afford another international adoption (unless someone wants to give me money), I don't want an older child from foster care (GOD may lead me to another change of heart), but I was also told that Aidan is now the first born in the family and they do not recommend changing the birth order (there is some variance here, as they also stated that since he was the baby in his first family, an older child would be OK).
So that is the news, in another year, Little Bug and I could be welcoming another family member- even temporarily. I am open to GOD's leading and I am so grateful for the example of Little Bug's first family. GOD used them to show me what selfless love is like and to show me that the pain can be given back to him to carry.

Love to you,
Momma Bug