Thursday, January 31, 2008

More words- no pictures

I will have pictures this weekend- Tink sent 120 photos of Little Bug that she has taken since Christmas and there are some cute ones!!!!

So Bug and I got to go speak to interested families for our agency this evening. We were the only ones from the Guatemala program- which makes sense right now since no referrals are being given out by our agency until Guatemala and the US figure out the new processes. It was interesting to hear families in the China, Vietnam, Waiting Children and Kaz programs talk about their experience. So different from Guatemala.
I have been thinking about a sibling for Little Bug- I never wanted to have just one child- I was going to have 2 sets of twins (yes, pick yourselves up off the floor). I know that being a single parent leaves a huge burden on Little Bug should anything happen to me- he will be alone again. Or if I needed care in my old age, then he would be the only one to shoulder that responsibility. So, since even before Little Bug came home, I had planned on 2 children- heck my I-171H approved me for 2 orphans- I just could not get my homestudy agency on baord with that plan.

But, there was a plan and I would have been overwhelmed with 2 children right away- heck it was overwhelming enought with just Little Bug. but now I am feeling more confident and I feel like there is a "sibling" for Little Bug in Guatemala. Not a birth sibling, but a child who will be part of our family, who will be a sibling and beloved son or daughter.
So I sit here waiting for the powers that be to iron out the process in Guatemala, hoping and praying that adoptions will continue (for selfish reasons in my case), and preparing for another wait, another process that will not smooth (better to plan for the worst, hope for the best and be happy if you fall somewhere inbetween)
My agency recently announced a pilot program in another country and I considered it for a week or so. But in the end I realized that while I really struggled through my process in Guatemala, at least I now know where to get extra help (and beleive you me, I am hiring them from day 1), I know the questions to ask, I know the forums to get answers and I know that I can head down pretty easily if I need to go down to check on things for myself. I did nto want to go through another process being in the dark and not knowing who to turn to/trust and what to do next. It jsut was too much like the start of Little Bug's process and I could not face that again.

So you heard it here- I am hoping and praying to start another adoption sometime this summer- but this time, I am not posting any timelines, any hopes or dreams for when I could be traveling (hey, hold me to this people).

Love and hugs to you,

Monday, January 28, 2008

Happy Birthday to me and loving life with Little Bug

So today is my birthday- yes, I like to tell people. I am proud of my age and my life- although I can not figure out how I got to be 42 years old- when did that happen? I am sure that it was just yesterday I was graduating from college.

My sister told me I should be 24, but I disagree. If I was 24 then I would years away from Little Bug being my son and I would not go back to that age- I love being Little Bug's momma and he is my life.

So here is my delicious cake- chocolate fudge cake, with chocolate icing, M&Ms and fudge twirl ice cream- any one see a theme? Yes, Bug sees the theme and he thinks it is funny (also messy). I think birthdays are going to be at my house from now on.
This is the smiling face I have seen since Saturday night. I got home on time (thanks to switching flights and a direct flight home). I called my parents to let them know I was on the ground, I called my brother as I got in the car. He told me that Little Bug was not home yet. So as I drove onto my street, I looked for the car- it must have been hidden. I pulled into the garage and waited for Little Bug to open the door to garage- nothing happened. So I pulled my bags out of the car and headed into the house. Once inside, I heard "I think I hear momma" and there he was was, running toward me down the hallway- face all aglow and the hugest smile on his face. Soon I was hold on to him as he he hugged me tight and all was right in the world- all was good. I was home and Little Bug was in my arms.
Playing with Little Bug- he does not want me far away, but he is fine. he tells me "I miss you long trip" translation- I missed you while you were on your long trip. This is a dream come true- someone waiting for me, someone missing me (yes mom, I know you missed me when I left, but this is different). We are settling back in. I made the decision to have Little Bug sleep in my bed on Saturday night, I missed him and I wanted us both to get a good night's sleep. Sunday was Baby day at church and since Little Bug and I were at the front of the church and I forgot my camera- you will have to wait for pictures from the day until Mam and Cousin Tink send me the pictures (that would be a hint people, send the pictures!!!!!!!)
On Saturday morning, at the training, they had a custard pie baby for me for my birthday. It was so nice. This is last weekend before I left on my trip. Little Bug was out enjoying the snow. Remember this is the kid who was not too sure about snow just a month ago. Now he wants to go play in it.

Throwing a fist full of snow at me- I can't say it was a snow ball as the snow was so dry it would not crush into a ball.
chasing me through the yard. He thought this was a blast.
Yes, he is eating the snow!!! Apparently snow still tastes great when eaten off of cotton gloves (something I did when I was younger).
I "showered" him with snow. he was not to excited about the snow going down into his collar. but we had a fun 20 minutes out in the snow running around. We had to come in and have hot chocolate to warm up.
So that is the last week in our lives. We survived being apart and we are glad to be back together.
If you have time in your prayers, would you pray for my mom? She is being tested right now and she needs support and love.
Love and hugs to you,
Deb AKA Momma Bug

Friday, January 25, 2008

Momma is coming home

The weather has been wonderful-such a change from the dreary winter and cold back home, but I am ready to come home and be with my Little Bug. I finally understood what he was saying to me on the phone. For the last 2 days when I have called him, he has asked "momma, up". It dawned on me today that he wants me to come and pick him up from Auntie Lulu's house. When asked if this is what he wanted, he said yes and when I told him it would be one more night and momma had to take a big plane to come get him, he was sad. I think he will be happy to have me home.

This is a picture of the courtyard at the hotel- we sat out here for lunch today. Yep- that is me- looking more and more like my mother.
I love this scenery- it is just around the corner from my room. I like the dry creek bed and the cacti growing all along the creek bed.
This evening- knowing by this time tomorrow, I will be home with Little Bug, sleeping in my bed.
Sunset in the court yard.

Now- there are pictures further down- they are the blisters on my feet- just in case you all thought I was embellishing the extent of the blister- it is not a pretty sight.

They hurt like heck. They are the least of my worries right now. My ear refuses to pressurize, this is bad given that I have to get on a plane tomorrow. I serious think my ear drum is going to rupture on the flight. The folks here with medical backgrounds think I am in for a rough time on the flight. So prayers that my ear finally pressurizes and I can get home with the least of amount of pain are greatly appreciated.
Love and hugs to you all,
Deb AKA Momma Bug

A better day

Things are better today. I could barely walk in the morning, but by this evening the blisters on my feet had gone down enough- or maybe the band aids cushioned them enough that I could actually walk without pain.

This is my hotel room from the front door- I have a front door and back door!!!
Standing by the beds- I love the leather chair
This is the view out of my backdoor- that is Camelback mountain in the distance. Personally I think it looks like a person sleeping more than a camel- but I can see how it can be a camel too.
This is the front- each room is an individual condo type dwelling. Apparently the hotel does not own the rooms, they are vacations homes here at the resort and the owners lease them back to the hotel for a fee. Pretty nice idea I think.
This is Mummy mountain- not really sure it s Mummy.
So exhaustion is setting in tonight. I did not sleep well last night and today was a long and busy day. Tomorrow is another long day, so I am off to bed.

Love to you,
Deb AKA Momma Bug

Thursday, January 24, 2008

After a few bumps, I arrived

Dear Mom and family,

Just a quick note to let you know I arrived in Arizona. I missed my connection in Houston thanks to a weather delay on the flight, plane side baggage being delivered very slowly, plane arriving at the wrong side of Terminal A, so that I had to walk to terminal B (not on the train line) and then go back through security. All this after being pulled aside at home because the security screener thought my passport was a fake!!! Yep- I can travel to Guatemala and Canada on my passport- but heaven forbid I want to travel within the US on it.
So after missing my flight, I was pretty dejected, but Continental came through and I was already booked for the next flight out of Houston before I got to the counter. So off to Terminal C I trekked- but this time I got to take the train. Unfortunately, I now I have a blister on the bottom of each foot from the trek from Terminal A to Terminal B- so walking is painful.

Lest you think that this trip is off to a horrid start- I arrived at the hotel- which is really a Spa and Resort and I do mean Spa and Resort. Wait till you see the pictures!!!!! If you can imagine a typical hotel room- think 4 times bigger and ever so much nicer.
I took a nice hot bath tonight after dinner in the hopes of relaxing, did a little work and I am heading to bed.

Tomorrow is a new day and it can only get better after today's adventure- or at least it can't be much worst. I am going to change my flight plans for coming home- I doubt there is any way I will make the connection coming back with only 30 minutes between flights. I will call with my new flight numbers and time.

Love to you and hug my Bug for me.


Monday, January 21, 2008

Second birthday party of the weekend

A 21 year old suffering the ill-effects of a late night party- let this be a warning to the soon to be 16 year old also living in the same house- not the way you want to spend your birthday!!!!! Yep- it is official, I am the aunt to a 21 year old. how the heck did that happen? when did we all grow up? Wasn't it just yesterday that we were all crowded into a hospital room waiting to see Tink for the first time? Happy Birthday TINK- you were beautiful on that day 21 years ago and you are beautiful today. Waiting for cake and ice cream
Yes, I can fit this in my mouth- just watch (it fell of the spoon before it got to his mouth and he never realized).

So after eating cake and ice cream and Pizza, what does a healthy toddler want to do-
Why work out on the exercise bike of course!!! First some upper body arm exercise
Then an attempt to get both feet on the pedals at the same time
Back to upper arm workout- the legs are too tired from the attempts at pedaling.
And finally, we're out of here peeps. Little Bug picked up his suitcase from Mam so he could pack some toys for his stay with Auntie Lulu. Unfortunately he seems to think that the suitcase is now is purse and he needs it every time we leave the house.
I am not sure I will posting the rest of the week- I am leaving Wednesday for a business meeting that runs through Saturday and I will only have my work laptop, so I can't upload pictures. I am going to check with the hotel and see if I can post pictures in the business center so Little Bug can see me once a day.
Love to you all,
Deb AKA Momma Bug

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Picture- NOPE

So no pictures tonight- I did take some today at Tink's birthday celebration so they will be up tomorrow, but I thought I would write about Dateline.

I watched the Dateline piece on Guatemalan adoption- but it really was not so much about all Guatemalan adoptions as it was about one facilitator who works with some agencies ( I really don't know how many, but one is one too many). This man is banned by the US embassy as of 2005 and he boasted of facilitating 167 adoptions in 2006 and expecting more in 2007 (this was filmed over the summer).

The agencies that work with him- scumbags, the fact that he continues to work in the adoption world- a travesty. Families have been destroyed by this man, dreams have been ripped apart and this man just goes on like nothing bad ever happened.

My heart breaks for families in situations with agencies who work with him and people like him, my heart breaks for families who lost their dream, my heart aches for the children.

To my friend who was brave enough to tell her story- you are a warrior and a true momma. May your dream find wings this year and may you be all you want to be.

Love to you,
Deb AKA Momma Bug

Saturday, January 19, 2008

MK2's birthday

Today Little Bug and I were feeling better and after being on antoibiotics for almost 24 hours, we ventured over to the MKs for MK2's 2nd birth day.

Singing to MK2 Not quite sure what this is all about
blowing out the candles- she really never put alot of force behind her blow so it took about 5 tries and moving the cake before the candle went out.
Liking the streamer more than the cake
This is what happens when you have the camera on telephoto and Little Bug gets up close and personal with the camera- I might save this for a post entitled "through the eyes of a toddler"
MK2 has a fire truck car and Little Bug was loving it.

MK2 was riding on top and we were trying to get Little Bug in the truck- he finally got in and my camera batteries died- Seriously DIED as I was taking the picture
Having fun

Taking a picture of momma with the radio!!!! Only my bug

The door doesn't open- well that does not stop the Little Bug
yes, he can climb in. Now I just need to teach him the NASCAR sytle for entry into a car and he is set

MK2 trying to escape the Little Bug
Here, MK, you press the horm this way
This looks so innocent, but 2 seconds later, Little Bug booped the ballon into MK2 face and that pretty much ended the day. Sometimes I think he needs to be around younger kids more often. The teenagers and dogs at my sister's house really don't respond the way his peers do. I think he needs some more one on one time with other toddlers.
And finally, a suitcase for Little Bug to take to Auntie Lulu's house while momma is traveling for business this week. He really likes the suitcase, I am not so sure he gets that we are going to be apart for 3 nights and 4 days. I am not sure Momma gets it either, but I am looking forward to having a bathroom to myself and possibly taking a bubble bath- heck a long hot shower would be nice too.
Birth day party 1 down- just Tink's tomorrow and we are done for 1 week.
Love to you,
Deb AKA Momma Bug