Let's talk about Sana

So here is the deal- I feel like I am being pressured into taking a different route for Christmas than I want to. So let's go back to the beginning.

For years I have held onto the idea of 3 Christmas presents for my child(ren) at Christmas. I watched this with my dear friends M and Sand their girls S and J. They lived downstairs from me when I was in college and they are family that led me to accept Christ. I watched their family and realized that things are not a sign of love, that love and Christmas are so much more than the presents under the tree (sounds like the "Grinch who stole Christmas- doesn't it). Which is not to say that I ungrateful for the presents that my parents have given me, just that I decided to go a different route for Christmas when I became a parent.

Last year, as I dreamed of Little Bug being home at Christmas, I struggled with what to get him- some books, some clothes , a toy? In the end the choice was made for me by a slow lawyer and a KO from PGN. Little Bug got 1 train and 1 set of cars- sent via King Express. I took 1 more toy with me to Guatemala last year, but it came from Mam. So last year turned out to be easy thanks to horrid process.

This year, as I prepared for Christmas, I planned on:
1. vacation later in the year
2. A membership to the museum center
3. sleeping bag and tent- for our vacation.

I knew that Mam/Pap, Auntie Laura and family and Uncle Dave would be buying toys and Little Bug would be fine. There was no plan to have gifts from Santa under my Christmas tree, Santa was not part of my Christmas plans- other than pictures at the mall.

But along the way, the last few weeks, Santa has been sneaking into the equation. My mom let me know that when we were little, every present under the tree was from Santa- there were never presents from my parents until we stopped believing in Santa. My sister let me know (my interpretation) that she was not pleased with my decision to have no presents from Santa. Now the comments from my family are "well when we get there, there will be plenty of presents under the tree- Little Bug will never know". yes mom, I know you are reading- please don't take this personally- I am just writing it out to figure out what I am going to do. Well the comments from the family and the realization that I need 2 presents from Santa for parties we are going to, have led to me stressing over the fact that Little Bug will not have a ton of presents and there will be no presents from Santa under the tree.
Since we visited Michigan, I have been obsessed with finding a particular toy for Little Bug, just because he played with it at E's house. I have been to 3 toys stores, checked online, search other stores and I still can't find what I am looking for. I was panicing that Little Bug would not have a wonderful Christmas. Heck I went to the mall tonight and I never set foot inside a mall this close to Christmas- there are too many stressed out people out shopping this time of the year (yes, written with a smile on face since I was one of those people tonight).

But consider, perhaps the reason I can't find what I am looking for, is because Little Bug does not need that toy. Does he need another car, or more people to play with? Does he want more cars or people to play with ? Will I be a failure as a parent because there are no presents from Santa under the tree? Or will I be a failure because he only gets a few presents from me? The answer to all the questions is NO.

Little Bug will never know the difference in his presents. Seriously, does anyone remember what they got for their 2nd Christmas- can you tell me what you got last year for Christmas? probably not. We don't need more toys at this house, we need more activities that we love, we need more hugs, more time, more interaction. So this year Little Bug is getting more than 3 presents but they are all from Momma- but they fit into 3 catagories:
a train set that can be added too- Uncle is getting some of the add-ons
Some wooden puzzles, including 2 that have noises
chunky crayons- perfect for toddler hands

We will still get a family pass to the Museum center and take a family vacation, but those are not presents this year.

Santa (at the 2 parties) is giving him a Backyardigans CD/book and a police car (goes with the train set).

So while Santa is cool for pictures, OK for parties, I don't think he will making an appearance at our house anytime soon. And you know what- I feel better already.

Love to you,
Deb AKA Momma Bug