Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Repercussions

Traveling for work has repercussions at home. The ripple effect of changes to our routine and to Bug's sense of security are felt for days and weeks at a time. I see the patterns now, I see the need in his behaviors and in his eyes for time with me and I am getting better at redirecting both of us to better behaviors before things get really bad at our house.
What I have not figured out is how to get us there faster. Case in point, I got home at 1 am on Friday morning, Bug was at my parents' house. I was able to pick him up on Friday afternoon at the regular pick up time on a work day. By this time, I am exhausted and he is tired of being away from home. Our weekend is really spent trying to catch up on things around the house- cleaning, laundry, yard work. There is no time to just sit and be still. I am lost in the fog of exhaustion- from travel, from work, from being a single mom, from fighting off a cold/illness. All I want is to sit and be still. All Bug wants is to play and be with me. Do you see the conflict? do you see the battle lines being drawn? I did, but I could not find the energy to break out of the exhaustion.
So, the behaviors driving both of us spiraled and we became adversaries for a day. But looking at my computer screen this morning, I realized, this was not what I wanted for this week. I did not want to be fighting and struggling through the week- praying for the weekend to arrive before we had a major melt down. So I took what I saw as the only choice- I took 1/2 day of vacation and picked up Bug from my sister's. We spent the afternoon hanging out at the aquarium, laughing and talking. We took a nap and rested, we watched some TV (Dora and Diego), we played cars- we had time together with no one else, no agenda, no limit.
We made a video for Abby, we read some books, we snuggled. We reconnected as a family. Life feels better. I did the right thing.
Some days I have to put work first but most days I need to put Bug first. This was one of those days.


Some pictures of the skyline from the Levee where the aquarium is located.


My little guy- worn out from seeing the fishes and worried that Momma might make him touch the sharks



Happy little frog


Turtle picture by Bug. All the fish, turtles and other things were moving around. I guess we went at the right time- lunch time!!!!




Octopus- you might have to open up the picture to see it better. It was cool. We were not allowed to use flash cameras to get pictures of octopus. But I love how the suckers on the tentacles are soo white on the glass.





Sea Horse picture by Bug


Love to you,
Deb

2 comments:

Julie said...

I know how overwhelmed I feel and I don't have the added stress of traveling like you do. I wish I had some answers for you, but at the least please know you have my support in whatever way you need it. It sounds like the 1/2 day off was the perfect solution.

Stacy J said...

Good for you! I don't have the traveling to deal with, but I often feel like I don't have time to just play with and enjoy Daniel. Kudos to you for realizing that you and bug needed that half day to enjoy one another! Hopefully, you are feeling more refreshed now!